Your alarm goes off… you’re a college kid, you don’t want to get up! The normal routine – hit the snooze button at least 8 times. But around snooze number 3 you hear a pleasant familiar noise coming from the kitchen. Its sizzling, popping and an aroma is drifting into your nose… itss…. BACON!!!
Nothing gets you up and going in the morning like bacon, am I right? The meat of men, the choice of champs, how could you go wrong. Well I tell you folks, you CAN go wrong! Have you ever pondered the nutritional stats of eating a porky product? Have you fathomed the fatty facts? Well I have, and I tell you good people of Comm 345 THIS. IS. A. PROBLEM. Bacon will kill you!
BUT! There is a solution to this piggy problem with a capitol P and that rhymes with T and that stands for Turkey!
Turkey? You ask? Yes, turkey! The answer my friends in indeed Turkey Bacon!
I will tell you all why turkey bacon needs to be your meat of choice
I will tell all you good people about the history of turkey bacon, the benefits of turkey bacon, and the availability of turkey bacon.
- As you may imagine, turkeys have been around for a very long time.
- They were going to be our national bird if Ben Franklin had his way, so let’s still show these semi-noble birds some respect and devour them often.
- You ever bowl a turkey? Good things happen with this beautiful bacon bird.
Turkey Bacon History
- So what’s turkey bacon?
- 1. turkey bacon. A wannabe police officer. Urban Dictionary.com
- 1. bacon made from turkey instead of pork According to answers.com
Why is turkey bacon?
- Many religions to not participate in pork-related meals such as Orthodox Jews, Muslims, some Christian groups, and extra-terrestrials.
- For the Jews and some Christians, the Old Testament declares that swine is an unclean meat and is therefore not to be eaten. [Lev 11, Deut 14]
- For Muslims, the Qu’ran, for Martians the fact that pigs smell bad.
There is a basic human need to eat long thin strips of meat, and millions of people were missing out. Problem? Yes. Answer: Turkey Bacon. [show poster of bacon]
Does this apply to you? It just might!
If you’re a strict religious Jew looking for some meat to chew…
If you’re a member of Islam-ie sick of seeing pork salami…
If being Christian is your choice, eat some (c)lean meat and rejoice…
If you haven’t a religion, but need some help inside your kitchen…
Just ignore the swine and you’ll be fine… TURKEY BACON!”
Let’s talk turkey…
Pigs: Salmonella – 7% of pigs are infected when they leave the farm, but 50% are infected after slaughter
Turkey: USDA reports 13% of turkeys shipped out contain salmonella
Pigs: A cool thing I discovered on amazingdiscoveries.com, is that [because of a poor waste systems in pigs] if you just even squeeze a pigs hooves, a green poisonous ooze comes out. That’s bad enough, but that can get clogged up and go back into the system and you eat it.
Turkey: No ooze with turkeys… They don’t even have hooves…
Pigs: Worms and other tiny critters can and often do live inside of cysts and the intestines. I found at amazingdiscoveries.com that there are 11 different types of worms that live in pigs – some up to 18 inches!
Turkey: No worms, not a scavenger. You eat meat that is fairly purified. They usually eat just plants.
Pigs are omnivores, which means that they consume both plants and animals. Pigs will scavenge and have been known to eat any kind of food, including dead insects, worms, tree bark, rotting carcasses, garbage, and even other pigs. In the wild, they are foraging animals, primarily eating leaves, grasses, roots, fruits and flowers. Occasionally while in captivity, pigs may eat their own young if they become severely stressed.
A lot of the toxins in meats is stored in the fat. Normally, in beef and turkey meat and such, it can be easily torn away, but it’s all intermixed with pigs (what the bible says about healthy living)
A quote form the amazing discoveries page “Scavengers, such as the swine, are the filthiest, most abominable creatures. In their very nature they are poisonous, diseased and deadly. The flesh of the swine is said by many authorities to be the prime cause of much of our American ill health…” and it continues to list the problems linked with pigs.
The list goes on…on various websites. I’m not here to totally bash pigs, but just to tell you that switching to turkey bacon may just make a decent improvement to your long-term health
- Right here in my pocket [throw fake meat at audience]
- Available in your grocer’s freezer
- Available in Jewish Deli’s and Turkey stores, but most chains carry it.
- Kraft now has its own line of turkey bacon (as well they should)
Often times, turkey bacon is much less expensive than pork bacon – sometimes half the cost!
You’ll get the best of both worlds with Turkey Bacon: the thin long strips of meat, but the lean mean non-fatty goodness of tried and true turkey! Turkey bacon was started in order to have a breakfast meat that people could actually eat, but now we can enjoy the natural goodness of this lean and tasty meat. Remember -you can find it almost anywhere, so give it a shot. You won’t regret it!
So please decline the urge to dine with swine
You’ll start to whine if you scarf down rind
The choice is yours (not mine) to keep your health in line
If you need a sign, I’ll give you nine…
So just stick with turkey bacon and you’ll be fine.
Turkey bacon: whats in YOUR skillet?!